Celebrity Big Brother 2012 – Day 5 – The Situation set ‘Awkward Situation’ secret mission

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Tuesday 21 August 2012
Celebrity Big Brother 2012 – Day 5 – The Situation set ‘Awkward Situation’ secret mission

Recap of day 5 in the Celebrity Big Brother house; highlights show Monday 20 August 2012.


Housemates awake after a restless night of sleep. Julie notices that Jasmine has been sleeping on the floor: “You know we’ve got an inmate on the floor down there,” she quips. Martin comes to kitchen and asks Julie and Julian whether there was a “snore fest” last night. Both Julian and Julie claim that they didn’t hear snoring and Julie says: “My old man snores all the time, so I find it comforting.” Cheryl is in the shower and becomes agitated by the cameras: “Big Brother you are being really nosey to keep on looking in the shower!” she exclaims. Coleen laughs and slides the shower door closed for her friend.

In the bedroom Jasmine, Danica and Rhian are getting glamorous. “It’s taken four days but we’re sitting here in front of the mirror as friends,” Jasmine asserts. Danica replies: “I can’t believe it” and brands the situation as “weird.” Jasmine admits that she “wasn’t sure” about Danica and Rhian to begin with. Danica becomes defiant and retorts: “You were fine with Rhian!” Jasmine claims that Rhian seemed “scared” to begin with and she was dubious of the Page 3 beauty.

Ashley comes to the diary room. “There’s definitely a situation,” he jokes to Big Brother. Ashley admits that he feels “down” adding: “One day I’ll meet my princess.” He believes that Rhian does fancy him and she thinks he’s a nice guy. He becomes defensive and declares: “I don’t care, as long as I respect myself and my family.” He continues to tell Big Brother that he will not be “begging” for Rhian during the rest of his time in the house.


Jasmine and Julie are in the bedroom. Jasmine tells Julie that she is “so happy” that Julie is in the house. Julie comforts Jasmine and tells her that the feeling is mutual. Conversation turns to the “younger girls” in the house and Jasmine confides that “she would go mad” if it were just her and “youngsters” living together. Julie brands Jasmine as “an intelligent girl” and Jasmine becomes coy. “No I’m not. I just don’t want to talk about who fancies who in the house all the time.”

Conversation in the garden is far less profound. Cheryl, Coleen and The Situation are talking about silky knickers. “They stain and they keep slipping off,” Coleen claims. Cheryl continues: “It’s like friction. I feel like I’m going to self combust. Imagine if your crunch (sic) was like a matchstick box and if you’d grown a bit of hair on it, the friction would be up against that, you’d be up like a light! It would be like a ying-yang-yoo campfire starting!” The Situation is seemingly overwhelmed by Cheryl’s outburst and informs both girls that he will take any words he likes back to America. He admits that he has never used the word “crunch” before and Coleen assures him: “I’ve never heard of it and I live here!” she shrieks.

The Situation tells Coleen that he may take “crunch” back to America because he finds it “funny” and Cheryl jokes: “You thieving my words?!” The three celebrities continue to exchange their preferred “crunch” lingo. The Situation tells Cheryl and Coleen that he likes the word “kitty cat”, but Cheryl is not a fan: “That reminds me of a food thing for cats,” she declares. Coleen says that she uses the word “tuppence and foof,” and Cheryl is stunned. She explains that “crunch” can also describe a type of person and “grips” her hand suggestively. The threesome begins to laugh uncontrollably and The Situation holds his head in shock. Cheryl begins to mock the American reality TV star: “Oh sorry. The Situation has gone a little bit embarrassed. Me thinks not. Well don’t hold your head in shame to me.” Coleen admits that she cannot call ‘hers’ a “crunch” because “there is a lack of grip since having kids.” Cheryl laughs hysterically from the pool after hearing Coleen’s revelations.


Samantha and Jasmine are in the bathroom. Samantha tells her that she should write a biography after leaving the Big Brother house. Jasmine admits that she would “love” to write one some day but admits that there are a lot of legal issues outside the house that would affect this decision. Samantha becomes inquisitive and Jasmine brands her situation as “wild.” Jasmine reveals to Samantha that she still “loves” the unnamed man in question “like a brother or father.” She states: “There is only one man in this house, in this town, in this world. That’s the love of my life.” Samantha replies: “That is really sweet. That is really hard actually.”

In the diary room Harvey tells Big Brother that he has started to notice the true colours of his housemates: “ I’m not feeling the negative energy if I’m honest with you.” Harvey admits that he has seen a side to Jasmine that he does not like, despite him trying to help her with her problems. He admits that he is missing his daughter and shows his appreciation for “the good souls” in the Big Brother house: “Thank God for Cheryl, thank God for Ashley and thank God for Nanny Julie.” He reveals that he has given up on Jasmine adding: “She’s two different people”. Harvey brands her as: “Negative with a capital N” and explains that she always talks about herself: “It’s always me me me.”


Danica is treating Julian to a foot treatment. Julie is stunned she is not a professional and Julian admits that he would pay good money outside the house for the same treatment. “I wish I had more than two feet” Julian quips and Julie remarks: “He’s died and gone to heaven!” Coleen is talking about The Situation. She tells fellow housemates that she finds it difficult to have a conversation with him. “He just sits there and talks to me like you are old – go away.” Cheryl admits that she feels the same way: “He never asks how about youz. It’s always about me’s.” Sensing that Prince Lorenzo may feel uncomfortable, Coleen assures him: “Having said that, I do like him. He is a really sweet guy.”


Prince Lorenzo and Martin are in the kitchen, struggling with the cooker. With so many buttons on the cooker to choose from, Prince Lorenzo is puzzled: “What is all this?” he asks Martin. Both men struggle to understand how to cook their potatoes and eventually Martin admits: “It’s all too complicated.”

The Situation is called to the diary room and is set a secret mission called Awkward Situation. Big Brother tells him that he must create six awkward situations. He makes his way over to an unaware Julie, The Situation asks her: “I bet you were a fox when you were young?” Straight talking Julie replies: “No.” The Situation continues to ask Julie whether her breasts are real, and peering down her t-shirt she replies: “F****** yes.” Next on The Situation’s radar is Julian. Looking up at Julian’s picture in the living area, The Situation informs Julian that he has worn make-up before. Collecting a lip-liner from the bedroom, The Situation continues to put it onto Julian as the stand-up comic attempts to finish his lunch. Martin is the next housemate to endure an ‘awkward situation’. The Situation asks Martin which deodorant he prefers and Martin becomes paranoid that he “smells.” “Am I smelly?” Martin asks, before The Situation passes him a can of Lynx body spray.

In the kitchen, Cheryl complains that she has an itchy bottom and The Situation decides to pounce. Informing Cheryl that he wants to give her a one minute cuddle, she asks whether she can scratch her bottom at the same time. Cheryl becomes irritated by how long the cuddle is lasting adding, “I’m getting bored now!” Julie is jealous that Cheryl is feeling the love and wants a hug of her own from The Situation: “Oh I’m getting a bit damp,” she quips. In the smoking area, The Situation is showering Rhian with compliments and tells her: “Your body is unreal.” Rhian tells him that she fancies “buff guys”, to which The Situation replies: “I kind of fall into that category.” He continues to inform Rhian that he would not be able to help himself if she were in her bikini, and seemingly unimpressed, the model replies sarcastically: “Thanks Michael!”

Housemates are gathered on the sofas in the living area. They are informed about The Situation’s secret mission. Big Brother reveals that The Situation has passed his secret mission and that housemates will receive a sexy hot tub party hosted by the American reality star. With water guns, drinks and music, the celebrity housemates are in their element and Julian comments to Julie: “This is just what the young ones needed.”


Martin is talking to Harvey about his acting career. Harvey realises that Martin has been in Eastenders and jokes: “Those cheques don’t bounce!” In the smoking area, Julie informs Julian and Ashley about swallows. Julian tells Ashley and Julie that he once stayed at “The White Swallow” hotel for gay guests and a naïve Ashley asks: “Was it nice?” Julie realises that Julian is being cheeky and replies: “Oh he doesn’t mean that type of swallow”. Julian admits that he was trying to be funny and Julie says that she believed him. The stand up comedian replies: “Oh my delivery was all wrong!” Julie proposes that they should open their own “White Swallow” hotel and Julian quips: “Savaloy’s in every room!” Ashley begins to laugh and voices his fondness for the pair.


Its dinner time in the house and Rhian and Ashley haven’t spoken all day, but are sat next to each other. Jasmine asks The Situation how he came to be known by his moniker. Julian laughs and warns Jasmine not to go there and relays his version of how The Situation got his name. “I love people watching,” Harvey tells Ashley as he observes his fellow housemates.


Julie and Julian are in the kitchen discussing plans for their new hotel. “The White Swallow, members only.” Julian quips: “Do we need to know if they’re gay, maybe we should give them a rectal examination upon arrival,” he laughs. “Would we do enemas?” Julie asks.

Some of the housemates are at the sofas and Rhian and Samantha are sat at the far end talking about Jasmine. “She changes like the wind, we’ll all be her target,” Rhian warns. “I feel like I’m better off keeping my mouth shut,” she continues and hopes that the eviction be sooner rather than later. In the living area, Julia confesses to Julian, “I’m quite relieved I’ve lost the mother role,” referring to Jasmine hanging out with other housemates. “There is just the odd flash of complete madness from her,” Julian remarks.


Rhian has decided to have an early night and Jasmine lies down with her. Samantha and Coleen have Rhian on their minds and discuss Ashley’s mood after Rhian revealed that she has a boyfriend. “I know its difficult cos he fancies her but he’s got to grow up, she’s being ostracised,” Coleen explains. They both agree that it was obvious that Rhian didn’t fancy Ashley. In the bedroom Jasmine tells Rhian that there is still so much that she wants to say while in the house. She adds that she is “irritated by the major lack of sensitivity” to what her and Rhian are going through by being nominated. “I’m sick of people telling me it doesn’t matter,” she says.


Coleen is taking action on Rhian’s behalf and confronts Ashley and Harvey. She tells them that it’s unlike Rhian to go to bed early adding: “I don’t want Rhian not to be part of your gang anymore.” “I understand the situation that it’s hard if you fancy someone and they don’t like you,” Coleen explains and the boys look embarrassed. Harvey tells her it was unintentional and tells her that he will smooth things over with Rhian and heads off to talk to her.

In the bedroom, Harvey asks Rhian why she is in bed. “I can tell your energy’s missing, I miss you, you’re my little Rhi, you’re a good person, I hate seeing people sad!” Harvey exclaims. Harvey leaves the room and Julian quips: “He was a bit aggressive but basically, he misses you.” Rhian starts to cry adding: “Basically, I’m trying to convince myself that I’m alright, I always feel like I’m talking about the same things.” She mentions a misunderstanding that she and Jasmine had and the mood shifts. “I don’t want to discuss this!” Jasmine snaps then jumps up and leaves the room, leaving Rhian stunned.


The Situation and Martin are talking about some of the girls in the house. “The
people who do well are those who are slipping and sliding,” Martin explains. He tells The Situation that the girls “are using what they’ve got” to stay in the house and mentions Jasmine. “She slung out her best story on the first night,” he says.

It’s been 65 minutes since Rhian and Jasmine last spoke. Most of the housemates are at the smoking area. “I’m very disappointed with this chick right now,” Jasmine declares while pointing at Rhian. She looks to Ashley and continues: “I do believe she’s led you on, I don’t think you’re f**king crazy, I feel like she’s manipulated you.” Jasmine tells them that she told Rhian to apologies to Ashley but Rhian refused and claimed that she had nothing to apologise for. Rhian tries to defend herself but Jasmine talks over her shouting: “Yes you did, yes you did!” Jasmine points to Danica and claims, “She (Rhian) did this chick in cos she was afraid of my wrath going in her direction,” and says that Rhian lied about how well she knew Danica. Rhian and Danica reveal that they have spoken about things and settled any previous bad feelings there may have been between them. Jasmine stands over Rhian and Ashley swiftly holds her back while trying to calm the situation. Jasmine tells housemates that she is telling the truth, “I swear on my son’s life,” she yells. She heads towards the house then comments: “I tried from the second I came in here!” “Me too, you’re manipulative!” Rhian shouts.

Jasmine goes into the house and immediately hugs Julie and sobs: “She told me a straight out lie!” Julie hugs her and tells her its okay, “You’re back with your mother now.”


Julia and a teary Jasmine have come into the diary room. “I feel its f**ked up, after I’ve supported this girl, she makes me look like the bad girl,” cries Jasmine. She says that she feels like a “fool” for being kind to Rhian. “I didn’t come here to hang out with models, I can’t believe I’m having a conversation with them, I think it’s horrible what they do!”

Its lights out in the bedroom and Ashley is lying on top Rhian’s bed having a whispered conversation. Rhian tells him that she is sorry if she led him on, “I didn’t mean to do that,” she tells him. In the diary room Jasmine continues: “This kid, this martial artists has got a crush on her, she realised that. When I confronted her (about it) she deliberately put me in this villain part!” Prince Lorenzo and Samantha are in the living area talking about Jasmine and both agree that she needs help. “She wants to be on TV so badly, she thinks this is her opportunity,” he states.

Julie and Jasmine are in the corridor immediately outside the diary room. “I just want you to adopt me,” Jasmine confesses. Julie holds her and replies: “While we’re in here, I’ve adopted you, your mine.” They enter the living area and Samantha moves in to hug Jasmine and Lorenzo heads toward the bedroom. Jasmine calls out, “Are you alright Lorenzi (sic), can I have a hug?” He turns back and Jasmine drapes her arms around his neck as they hug. Samantha and Julie look on as he gives them a deadpan stare over Jasmine’s shoulder.

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